Have a nice day......

I've decided to try another approach to my mountain of shit. What mountain of shit you may ask? Oh! well let me tell you in the calmest way possible... I am referring to the mountain of dirty clothes, dirty dishes, receipts and important papers mixed in with junk mail. I'm talking about dirt that's maybe a few months old. I'm talking about cleaning products that have sat in the same place for so long that now they have piles of dog hair gathered near them. It sounds overwhelming but it could be way worse. It's clutter and disorganization piled on top of stuff that needs to be cleaned. but there's more, I'm in debt. I owe money to someone and I can't seem to knock that balance down. I've managed to keep all the other "wolves at bay" so to speak. But I'm not going to have the money to pay for this debt and the holidays. I also have homework for school due in two weeks maximum. I'm getting to the end of the semester and I have three monster papers I need  to work on. I have health problems: Depression, BAD allergic reactions to something I haven't quite nailed down yet. I'm trying to get a hold of my dr. so I can reschedule an appointment around switching health insurance companies. I have to winterize my house, The inside of my car is a wreck. I'm constantly late to work and when I get there, I'm so wiped out, either by my depression, the meds that fight my depression, or staying up late trying to get homework done before my deadlines. When I get to work, I feel like a joke because I'm aimless. there's so much to do there too, I'm wiped out and overwhelmed to the point of paralysis. I wind up stress eating, raging out, disappearing or doing "busy work."

I've told myself: This isn't working. I can't keep doing stuff like this anymore. I need help (I got help, help doesn't seem to help). I used to get so angy, scream and punch things until I realized that I was only hurting myself more. I'm trying to be compassionate and non-judgmental. Yea I'm buried under a mountain. Deep breaths....